Oh dear, I think I might be an introvert.
Everybody else thinks I’m an extrovert because I talk all day for a living, but let me tell you why I think I’m an introvert.
Understanding this is important because it’s about understanding yourself and other people, so here we go:
Starting with a quiz question for you:
Which of the following Jungian types would you describe as introverts?
The Analytical is easy, but I wonder what you picked as the second one? Probably the nice quiet Amiable, which would mean that THESE are your choices as Introverts:
They do look like the obvious choices, being all quiet and mousy as they are.
…but Amiables DO have social needs, they like to be part of a group even if they don’t say much. They care about other people, they like to listen to other people, they like to be in a team (I don’t fit into any of those three I’m ashamed to say!).
The Myers Briggs definition of E and I is that E’s (extroverts) get energy from other people while I’s have to use up energy to be with other people. Well I would say that the nice Amiables do get energy from other people – they quietly soak it up like sitting in the sun.
Meanwhile the Controller, ordering people about and giving opinions, taking control, making speeches and making decisions, appears to be an extrovert, but ARE they? Do they really like people, and being with people? I’m a Controller, and I’ve been away this week travelling on my own – and every evening I’ve eaten alone in a restaurant and then sat with my laptop in a hotel, and I’ve bloody loved it. I think that would make me an introvert.
So don’t assume I’m an extrovert just because I’m assertive. My favourite team size is ONE, and people are just one more part of the problem of a world that needs sorting out.
So l’d like to suggest that THIS is what introverts are:
I think it’s worth being clear what “Introvert” means. Is it someone who isn’t assertive, or is it someone who doesn’t need the company of others?
I googled introvert and found this:
Here are some classic Introvert descriptors:
- I don’t talk a lot.
- I think a lot before I speak or act.
- I don’t like to draw attention to myself.
- I am quiet around strangers.
- I have no intention of talking in large crowds.
But they are muddling up the two types, the ones who don’t NEED to socialise and the ones who don’t APPEAR sociable because they are quiet.
Here are some interesting snippets from Wikipedia:
Introversion
Introversion is “the state of or tendency toward being wholly or predominantly concerned with and interested in one’s own mental life”.[4] Introverts are typically more reserved or reflective.[5] Some popular psychologists have characterized introverts as people whose energy tends to expand through reflection and dwindle during interaction.[6] This is similar to Jung’s view, although he focused on mental energy rather than physical energy.
Introverts often take pleasure in solitary activities such as reading, writing, using computers, hiking and fishing. The archetypal artist, writer, sculptor, engineer, composer and inventor are all highly introverted. An introvert is likely to enjoy time spent alone and find less reward in time spent with large groups of people, though he or she may enjoy interactions with close friends. Trust is usually an issue of significance: a virtue of utmost importance to introverts is choosing a worthy companion. They prefer to concentrate on a single activity at a time and like to observe situations before they participate, especially observed in developing children and adolescents.[7]
Mistaking introversion for shyness is a common error. Introverts prefer solitary to social activities, but do not necessarily fear social encounters like shy people do.[10]
Susan Cain, the author of the book “Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can’t Stop Talking” argues that present Western culture misjudges the capabilities of introverted people, leading to unused talent and energy.[11] The author, a self-described introvert, points out how society is biased against the introvert. From childhood they are taught that to be sociable is to be happy. Introversion is now “somewhere between a disappointment and pathology”.[12]
Maybe the best thing is to give up on using extrovert/introvert and instead use the four types model?
CC Nov 2015
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